Are you prone to saying YES when you mean NO?
Have you ever compromised doing what is right for you because you fear what will happen if you don’t?
Yup, I relate too. So many times in life I found myself saying yes and I really wanted to say no. I would often make decisions purely based on fear. Fearing that if I did what I truly wanted to do (which would often involve saying no 🙈) people would think less of me, judge and criticise me.
In my early working years I often did work that I hated and left me feeling undervalued, over worked and empty. The long hours in clothes shops bored the living hell out of me, the fish and chip shop left me stinking (and people taking a wide birth because of the smell 😷) and cleaning toilets at a night club after a busy Saturday night (the toilets were like a horror movie) and the smell was vile to say the least. Saying yes to work for fear I may not get another job if I said no. I did not have the courage to wait for something that was a better match for me. I was in survival mode, that’s for sure.
I had to pay the bills right? Even though the jobs I did were mind-numbing, paid a ridiculously low (soul destroying) wage and had me working long painful hours, I often felt like I had no choice because I had to put food on the table and pay the ever increasing credit card that was racking up on interest by the second 😏
When I first set up my holistic business fear ruled the way there too. I would say yes to every client (even if they were not a good match) as I was afraid that if I said no then there would not be any more clients coming my way.
I had to take what I could get right? Or did I? Did I really have to comprise on how I felt to ‘get by’? Did I really have to do jobs that left me feeling exhausted just to make ends meet? I found out later on in life that the answer is an almighty ‘hell NO!’.
By working in conditions that comprise your integrity what message do you think it is sending to your subconscious mind? Err, something like ‘everyone comes before you, that they are more important than you and you better take what you can get because there may not be any more 😩’. That you have to receive the scraps in life because you don’t deserve or are worthy of more? These damaging subconscious messages end up corroding your confidence and after a while there is a part of you that genuinely believes ‘this is your lot’.
No my friends. All that is a lie.
Was it truly possible for me to do work that I enjoyed, where I chose my hours and get paid well for it? Work that lights me up and is in alignment with my deepest desires? The answer is an almighty ‘Hell YEAH!’.
Maybe years ago this positive mindset and vision would have felt like a pipe dream but evidence clearly shows that with determination, a clear vision and plan (and some elbow grease) that dreams really do come true.
It takes courage to say yes when you mean yes and no when you mean no. When you say no to something that is out of alignment with who you really are then you make way for something far bigger and better to come your way.
I have learnt that by saying no to something that does not serve me, I am actually saying yes to something that does. Being true to yourself takes great courage but most importantly sets you free to live life on your terms. You deserve an amazing life. Period.
With kindness,
